Hey Fraz!

My Jingle Ball Ticket raid visit to Montgomery College in Rockville, MD was a blast and turned into a stand up comedy show and dance party :) Thanks so everyone I met - xoxo, frase 

Since I’ve been on vacation up here in Maine I’ve been doing a lot of reading. I’m one of those self-improvement book readers. Love them…its always a nice reminder of how I could be improving my outlook on life, family, and business. My brother gave me “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” by Dale Carnegie for xmas and I came across this great daily reminder. Dale suggests doing these 10 steps on a daily basis. It struck a cord with me…thought I would share and hope it helps you. 

email anytime. sarahthefraz@gmail.com 

xoxo, frase 

1. Just for Today, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life-problem at once. I can do some things for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt I had to keep them up for a lifetime.

2. Just for Today, I will be Happy. This assumes that what Abraham Lincoln said is true, that “most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Happiness is from Within; it is not a matter of Externals.

3. Just for Today, I will Adjust myself to what Is, and not try to Adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my luck as they come, and fit myself to them.

4. Just for Today, I will take care of my Body. I will exercise it, care for it, and nourish it, and not abuse it nor neglect it; so that it will be a perfect machine for my will.

5. Just for Today, I will try to strengthen my mind, I will study. I will learn something useful, I will not be a mental loafer all day. I will read something that requires effort, though and concentration.

6. Just for Today, I will exercise my Soul. In three ways, to wit:

(a) I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out. If anybody knows of it, it will not count.

(b) I will do at least two things I don’t want to do, as William James suggests just for exercise.

(c) I will not show any one that my feelings are hurt. They may be hurt, but Today I will not show it.

7. Just for To-day, I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress as becomingly as possible,  talk low,  act courteously, be liberal with flattery, criticize not one bit  nor find fault with anything, and not try to regulate nor improve anybody.

8. Just for Today, I will have a Programme. I will write down just what I expect to do every hour. I may not follow it exactly, but I’ll have it. It will save me from the two pests Hurry and Indecision.

9. Just for Today, I will have a quiet half hour, all by myself, and relax. During this half hour, some time, I will think of God, so as to get a little more perspective to my life.

10. Just for Today, I will be Unafraid. Especially I will not be afraid to be Happy, to enjoy what is Beautiful, to love and to believe that those I love love me.

(Copyright, 1921 by Frank Crane)

I’m sitting at my mom and stepfather’s house up here in Maine today in the middle of this snowstorm and feeling really blessed and grateful. Grateful because you may have seen my blog post two weeks ago about My Weight that I posted after a picture of myself with the Kane Show crew in Tampa went up on Facebook. OMG…after two weeks I can’t thank you enough for all your emails sharing your stories and sending me awesome words of encouragement. Here are just a couple of the emails I received:

 

Sarah,

 

I just stumbled upon your kaneshow.com page after awhile of not reading it and I saw your “weight” entry.

I went through the same thing, and wanted to let you know it aint easy gaining weight OR losing weight. It’s not easy gaining because you usually hate yourself the whole time as you gain, and for the obvious reasons of losing weight….you know!

I am 30 years old, 5’2 and right now 122 lbs, but three years ago I was 140 lbs and it felt horrible!! It took ALOT of time and effort to lose the weight, but shit….I can honestly say some days I still feel just as “gross” at this weight than I did at my heavy weight. It’s all about your state of mind and how you feel INSIDE.

 

And Sarah, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL inside AND outside. I love listening to you in the morning, and I feel you are honest and speak what women REALLY think and are too afraid to say aloud. Thank you for being YOU, and for giving all women the voice that we are too timid to speak about.

 

I am 30, single, and FABULOUS. And my 30 year old ass that has junk in the trunk is fabulous too ;)

 

Hey Sarah,

 

My name is… I’ve spent a year in DC working at the Pentagon and I’m shortly to return to the UK. I’ve listened to you guys on the Kane Show and have really enjoyed your banter. You are the perfect foil to Kane. Googled you for the first time tonight and found your post on weight issues. Your take on the whole thing is absolutely spot on. I have a wife and 4 teenage daughters. I only hope that they all maintain your healthy perspective throughout their lives. You are evidently a strong and beautiful, intelligent woman. Best of luck in the future!

A bit late but still wanted you to know that you look gorgeous…there is nothing wrong about your appearance or weight.

You go girl!

Work it! 

 

It reminded me that being vulnerable always pays. Dealing with that sticky issue in your life whether its weight, family problems, abuse, abandonment will always connect you with others and no matter how alone you might feel or how ‘bad’ in your mind you think your issue might be someone can always relate.

 

One way to start is by keeping a journal. All my life I’ve kept a journal on and off but about 2 yrs. ago I really committed to writing in it regularly. It helped me to put on paper all the crazy thoughts I was having about food and to slowly start sorting out my crazy diet and exercise restrictions. Every couple weeks I re-read my journal to see how I was feeling and my anxiety about food at that time…that was the key for me to change. When I could see in writing how I physically felt when I would over eat it would help me to pause before going on my next major binge. Finally after two years I can honestly say that my binge eating has stopped, I’m still not where I want to be with having an easy relationship with food but its so much bettah.

 

Today could be your day to start sharing; writing, or expressing that ‘sticky’ thing in your life that instantly makes you feel ashamed or small. Finding a way to deal with that issue will totally change your life. I currently might be a little heavier than I was 2 yrs ago but I can’t tell you how happy and excited I feel about life. It’s better than ever!!!!

 

So thank you for all your words of encouragement and reminding me how grateful I am that I’m not alone in my weight journey. 

 

xoxo, frase

Mindful Eating: Sometimes therapy is the key

Do you feel like you’re an emotional eater? If you’re like me I’ve realized over the past two years that my yo-yo dieting really has nothing to do with calories I consume and has everything to do with my emotions. I’ve learned to recognize that when I’m in an unhappy work situation, when my mind isn’t being creative, and when I’m bored food is my friend. 

How did I figure out this out? All through therapy. Mindfulness therapy…its the approach of realizing what you’re feeling inside when you’re eating. When I was working out 6 days a week and eating just a grilled chicken breast (cooked without olive oil or butter, thank you) and grilled spinach every night for dinner I was miserable. I wasn’t kind or in love with myself at all. As a fellow morning show competitor told me when we were out to dinner he said ‘Sarah, you don’t even know how good you really are!” WOW…that stuck with me because even tho I was a size two, on the number one rated morning show in the DMV, and appearing weekly on Fox 5’s number one rated 10pm news show I didn’t think I was worth much. 

I believed…even at a size two, I was fat, not funny, needed a man to protect me, and I couldn’t get a boyfriend because physically I was a fraud and every dude would google me, realize I wasn’t normally a size two, and dump me cause I wasn’t going to look that way forever. The mind of a crazy woman, right?

Therapy is helping me challenge all those beliefs and Kelly Osbourne is on the cover of Cosmo body magazine this month with an inspiring article that she had to LOVE and be KIND to herself by getting into therapy before she could maintain her 69lb weight loss!

See, another DIET is not your answer…figuring out what you EAT when you EAT is the answer. 

Here’s some of what Kelly has to say:

‘People think I lost weight and that’s what made me happier. That’s not true; I had to learn to love myself first. 

‘Losing weight was just one benefit of putting the hard work in and sorting myself out on the inside first through therapy.’

Osbourne explaining that following therapy she finally learned to just be herself: ‘That was one of the scariest times of my life. I swear I’ve never felt more naked, because I had to actually be me and couldn’t mask it.’

And my fav line from the article:

She added: ‘If you want to change your body you can’t just diet; if you do that, you lose weight, then get fat. You’ve got to commit to a whole life change and teach yourself a whole new lifestyle.

What weight loss is really about is the emotions and the story you tell yourself about your own self worth. Do you think you’re worthy of love, success, a great family, freeing yourself of anger from past family issues, or what an ex-boyfriend did to you?

Mindful living therapy might be one way. Google Mindful living therapy in your area…see what comes up. Treat yourself to one session and see if you like it. Let me know about your food journey anytime. 

sarahthefraz@gmail.com 

xoxo, frase 

Here’s where my mindful living therapy has paid off. So this picture that was posted on Sunday night on The Kane Show page sparked a huge discussion about my weight on Sunday night. First, I want to thank the overwhelming positive comments defending my appearance and other members of the show. To everyone who posted positive comments and gets that life is more than a number on the scale I heart you.

 

I wanted to talk about this because what breaks my heart is not if someone on the page thinks I’ve gained weight…btw…I have. I’ve probably put on 25lbs in the past two years when I decided to give up dieting and stop working out with a personal trainer because my body hated it. I don’t know the exact amount I’ve gained because I threw away my scale. What breaks my heart is that some woman or young girl reading those comments may decide that its easier to NOT put herself out there and go for her dream because of someone’s negative comment.

 

You have to realize that people who would take the time to comment on your weight loss or gain are people you probably wouldn’t even stop to ask for directions from. People get fired, dumped, divorced all the time who are thin with perfect bodies. Jenna Wolfe on NBC’s weekend today show got demoted, Anne Curry fired, Jennifer Aniston was cheated on, we could make a huge list. After two years of therapy I will tell you unless you are at a weight that affects your health the number on the scale DOES NOT MATTER. My uncle Jay always told me “looks will get you in the door but your intelligence and personality is what will keep you.”

 

In a strange way I’m actually happy the negative comments were posted because thankfully I’ve done well enough for myself to do the mental work that makes me strong enough now to not take any comments personally; and to hopefully be an example to anyone reading this who might be afraid to go for a job interview or a date or take a risk and audition for a TV show because you’re afraid what people may say about your appearance. I hope you go for it…when you truly work on and know yourself you will always be more successful and happy than the person who fights to be a size 2 but still doesn’t know their true worth.

 

Thanks again for all love on this post…to read the comments click here and feel free to email me your story anytime.

 

LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU - frase - sarahthefraz@gmail.com  

HAHA..happy friday! I hope i’ll be meeting you later and giving you a hug a montogmery college in Rockville today at 2pm, i’m doing one of the last ticket raids before jingle ball this tuesday. See you there. OMG…this story btw made me die laughing. So in Japan they’re making cell phone cases that you can eat! HAHAH…its actually brown rice and apparently the cases are so fragile they won’t promise to deliver in one piece!

click here for the full story - CLICK ME

One enterprising Japanese businesswoman has created an iPhone 5 case that you can eat. Made entirely from Japanese brown rice and salt, the Survival Senbei iPhone 5 case is intended not so much to protect your phone, but to keep you going in the event of a large-scale natural disaster. The entrepreneur behind the Survival Senbei is a middle-aged master senbei artisan called Mariko. Senbei, traditional rice crackers, are the snack of choice for older Japanese, and Mariko came up with the senbei smartphone case as a way to broaden its appeal to the younger generation. The cases are available to buy online at a cost of ¥3,818 (which,RocketNews24 reports, is a Japanese mnemonic pun on the word ‘survival’). That works out to around £30, plus shipping.

HHAHAHA…I was literally laughing out loud when I saw this parody video of Taylor Swift and Harry Styles inevitable break up. Ashley Frangipane has written a parody of Swift’s “I Knew You Were Trouble” called “The Haylor Song.”

The hilarious tune is gaining quite a bit of buzz among 1D fans, and though we agree that it’s only a matter of time until they break up, we’re particularly amused by Frangipane’s self-awareness as a super fan: In the lyrics she admits that fans might hate anyone Styles is dating.

“And the saddest fear, comes creeping in/That we’d be pissed off, if he loved anyone, or anything. Yeah yeah yeah,” she wails in the song.

Frangipane’s song is an example of one of the healthier ways a One Direction fan can express outrage over the “Haylor” romance.

Enjoy the video. Also, are you going on a first date? Email me…I’m working on a project and if you want to be apart of it I could be buying you dinner and drinks for your first date. Email me: sarah@hot995.com

Here’s a pix of my amazing friend Jessica Baca. She’s also a Closet Shopper and stylist. Here’s her website: click here

 

Take a deep breath - Thanksgiving and the pressure to make a perfect meal is over.  Wait a minute, why is that familiar sense of panic creeping back into your head? Brace yourself - it’s now time to start shopping for the perfect gift (for everyone you know).



They hated what you purchased last year (and every year before that); should you throw in the towel and get gift cards?? No. It’s time to get creative and think outside the box…it’s time for a very Etsy Christmas!!



All of the following treasures are waiting to be purchased on www.etsy.com for everyone on your list starting
at just $8!!



What: Mean Girl quote pencil set, “YOU GO, GLEN COCO!/ BOO, YOU WHORE!/
GROOL/ THAT’S SO FETCH/ YOU’RE LIKE, REALLY PRETTY/ HER HAIR’S SO BIG IT’S FULL
OF SECRETS”, $8

Who: your BFF

Why: you both have the entire movie memorized, now you have another excuse to recite these quotes at will



What: “Cereal Killer” engraved spoon, $13

Who: your brother

Why: you’ve never seen anyone eat like him…and now he won’t have to use plastic utensils



What: Wine Bottle Snuggie, $8 (don’t forget the wine!)

Who: host/hostess

Why: it’s adorable…and much classier than a 7-11 bag



What: Trophy Bottle Stoppers, 3 for $35

Who: your college friends

Why: you all drink like champs, especially when together



What: Oxford Bottle Bag, $20+ (don’t forget the booze!$

Who: your boyfriend

Why: it’s preppy, fratty, and clever - just like him

 

Normally around Thanksgiving and Christmas I’m in panic mode, not because I have a ton of people to buy gifts for but
because the thoughts of gaining weight from holiday vacations and parties is too much.

In the past I would have spent half my day googling
‘tips and trick’s’ to avoid gaining weight during the holiday’s from every Women’s Health and Marie Claire article I can find. This is the first year I’m totally free of the holiday diet conversation at work and with my girlfriends.
I think you should try it to:) It’s scary, I know, the idea of going to all these holiday parties and not having your old ‘diet rules.’ AHHH

Here’s what I’ve done in the past and here’s how Mindful Eating has changed my old pattern of thinking. Last year…before any holiday party I would always eat a 1/4 c of almonds. It didn’t even matter if I was hungry, I just read that eating nuts before a party would prevent you from
reaching for all the finger quiches….it never really worked. I went into every holiday party with the same rules, only 2 appetizers and 2 drinks….period!

I never took into account the fact that the party might go from 5 to 10pm and by 10 if all I ate were two jumbo shrimp I’d be starving and scraping all the dip bowls for the last drop of ranch. Also, every year there is always that one party that I think I’m just going to stay for an hour and I end up having a blast, I want a 3^rd or 4th drink and stay all night. Here’s the problem because I use to live in diet mentality
I would spend the entire next day mentally beating myself that I was fat, I’d gained weight, and how was I going to appear on Fox 5 that week looking the way that I did? Urgh…it was torture.

This year, totally different. After working with my mindful living therapist for 2 years getting rid of the rules is the
key to weight loss, happiness, and helping to stop the crazy voice in your head that says you’re fat and no one will ever love you for who you are. So this year here’s my plan for holiday parties and thinking about the holiday weight
gain. I don’t think about it. I think like this…what time does the party start? 6pm…perfect…I’m going to have a small snack in the late afternoon…something that will energize me ( an apple, orange, half a power bar and some beet
juice). Then I go to the party and look around at the food and drink they have. I calmly check in with my body…hmm…what looks good? What will make me feel
good? Then I make some choices. Same goes for drinking. I know myself pretty well now unless I want to be hangover the next day 2 drinks is my max, so I usually sip slowly and pace out the night.

Also this year I’m no longer engaging my
friends in the conversation of how they’re planning to avoid gaining weight during the holidays. In the past I would say to my girlfriends ok, promise me you’ll make me go to an extra kick-boxing class this week, or I’d call my trainer and
see if I could make my half hour sessions that week into hours. It never worked; I’d end up canceling and eat more. Instead with my girlfriends I encourage them to be happy this year focus on ‘what’s not wrong right now’ in their lives and let’s change the food conversation. So far its working well…try it. You don’t have to take on your co-workers or sister’s holiday diet panic.

let me know how it goes, xoxo, Frase